Healing isn’t always about meditation cushions, sage sticks, or sitting cross-legged in silence. Even though these are healing methods it's mainly about addressing the things that are holding you back, recognising reactions and patterns that are not healthy or productive and looking at what's happening.

It’s real, it’s raw, and sometimes it’s messy as hell. But what happens when you avoid it altogether? Here are five things to know if you’ve been dodging your healing journey.

1. Avoiding it doesn’t make it go away: Stuffing it down, pretending it didn’t happen, staying "busy" all of that might help you get through the day. But that pain, trauma, or emotional baggage you’re ignoring? It doesn’t disappear. It just waits. It shows up later in your body, your relationships, your mental health, and even your parenting. Healing is what helps you stop reliving the same patterns over and over again.

2. You can’t logic your way out of emotional pain: Trying to explain, justify, or make sense of what happened to you won’t heal it. You can’t always think your way through pain, you’ve got to feel it. Healing asks you to slow down, get honest with yourself, and process the stuff you’ve been carrying. And yeah, that can feel scary and be very uncomfortable. But it’s also incredibly freeing.

3. Healing doesn’t mean you’re broken: A lot of people avoid healing because they think it means admitting they’re damaged. That’s not it at all. Healing is not about fixing yourself, it’s about reconnecting with the version of you that’s underneath all the hurt. It’s about reclaiming your voice, your confidence, your joy, and your power, your strengths that are being held back.

4. Your kids feel what you don’t deal with: Let’s get real for a second, your unhealed stuff doesn’t just impact you. It spills out in how you parent, how you handle conflict, how you show up when things get hard. The best gift you can give your kids? A version of you who’s doing the work. Not perfect, just real, self-aware, and learning how to cope and handle things in a healthier way.

5. Healing looks different for everyone: There’s no timeline. There’s no rulebook. You don’t have to cry every day or journal at 5am or book a retreat to Bali. Your healing might look like setting boundaries, saying no more often, going to coaching, trying EFT tapping, or simply learning to sit with your feelings instead of numbing them. There’s no "right" way to do this. Just your way.

Final Thoughts: Avoiding healing might feel easier short term, but long term it keeps you stuck. And stuck isn’t where you’re meant to stay. Healing is possible. It can be slow, it can be messy, it can be very uncomfortable, and it does take time, but it’s always worth it.

So If you're ready to start you breakup healing then I'm ready when you are. The link below is where you can take the first step.