Co-parenting is hard enough as it is. But co-parenting with someone who constantly twists the narrative, avoids accountability, and makes you question yourself? That’s a completely different level.

If you’ve ever walked away from a conversation feeling confused, blamed, or like somehow everything has been turned back on you, you’re not imagining it.

There are patterns in what gets said. And once you start noticing them, it becomes a lot easier to separate what’s actually true… from what’s being used to control, guilt, or manipulate.

Because the reality is, it’s not just about communication, it’s about the emotional impact that comes with it.

Here are some of the most common things you’ll hear when co-parenting with someone like this:

You’re being dramatic.

Minimises your feelings and makes you question your reaction.

It’s all your fault.

Everything gets shifted back onto you, no accountability, no ownership.

Why are you stopping the kids from seeing me?

Even when you’re following agreements or setting boundaries, it’s flipped to make you look like the problem.

The kids are going to hate you.

A direct hit at your identity as a parent, designed to trigger guilt and fear.

You’re never going to find someone else.

A personal attack meant to knock your confidence and sense of worth.

You’re so difficult to deal with.

Avoids the actual issue and turns the focus back onto you.

You’re making this harder than it needs to be.

Pressure to give in, just so they can continue to get their way

The kids are missing out because of you.

Blame gets redirected through the children to create more emotional impact.

Why can’t you just cooperate?

Which often really means: why can’t you just do as I say?

Why can’t you just listen to me?

An attempt to position themselves as the authority, maintain control and dismiss your voice.

Over time, hearing these things repeatedly can wear you down. You start second-guessing yourself. You question your decisions. You wonder if maybe you are the problem.

And that’s what makes it so hard.

Because you’re not just managing and adjust8ing to single parent life, you’re navigating constant emotional pressure, guilt, and manipulation, villainising, name calling.

It’s exhausting. And it's incredibly isolating.

But when you stop trying to “win” the conversation, when you stop trying to prove that you're not doing anything wrong and start focusing on how you respond, what you tolerate, and what you no longer engage in. That's when it starts to feel like there's light at the end of the tunnel.

This is exactly the kind of work we do in coaching that help you with manage cop0arenting with a narcissist. It's about...

✅ Building your confidence so you stop second-guessing every decision

✅ Strengthen your self-worth so their words don’t take control over you

✅ Set clear, firm boundaries, so they stop walking all over you

✅ Learn to emotionally detach so you’re not taking everything personally

✅ Stop engaging in the back-and-forth that keeps you stuck and endless texting battles

✅ Communicate in a way that’s calm, clear, and doesn’t fuel the conflict

✅ Recognise manipulation tactics so you’re not getting pulled into them

✅ Stand your ground without feeling guilty for it

Because the focus is not about hoping your ex will change, because they won't, it's about focusing on what you can control. And when you build that foundation, everything in your coparenting dynamic changes.

They will still say the same things. They still try to twist things and push your buttons. But it doesn’t land the same way anymore. Because it no longer has the same impact in you.

When you work through everything, you’re not reacting the same. You’re not taking things personally like you used to. And you’re not allowing their actions to dictate how you show up.

You start trusting yourself. You start backing yourself. You start finding your voice. And you stop being walked over in situations where you used to feel stuck.

However, f you choose to stay in the mindset of “I hope it gets better soon”, I can tell you, things don’t just magically change. I’ve been in this dynamic for over 12 years, and I’ve seen firsthand that it doesn’t just fix itself. It comes down to how you choose to handle it, and how you choose to react to it.

Because the more you stay in it without changing anything, the more it starts to wear you down. It slowly chips away at your confidence, your self-worth, and your ability to trust your own judgement. You start second-guessing yourself more. You start doubting yourself more. And over time, it can leave you feeling completely drained, like you’re just getting through it rather than actually living your life.

It is exhausting dealing with someone like this. And even though they may are the ones creating the behaviour, the real impact is how it affects you.

You can’t change them. But you can change how this is impacting you.

And that’s where the work comes in, understanding your emotional responses, recognising the patterns, and learning what you can actually do to protect your own mental and emotional wellbeing.

That’s exactly what we work through in coaching. And that’s the part that actually starts to change things for you.

And if you’re in this right now, feeling drained, frustrated, and questioning yourself, just know this:

You’re not the problem.

But how you respond, what you tolerate, and how you support yourself through it, that’s where your power is.

And that’s where things start to change.

Are you ready to make that change?

Click below if you are and let's get you to the other side and feeling in control of your life again.